Slight return

This spring has by far been the most hectic one of my life. When I tell that to my mom she laughs herself to tears – since she raised 5 children, studied and worked at the same time. I’m raising one child, studying and working and at times it can be hell trying to keep up. This spring was also topped by me having surgery on my hand and being on sick leave for two weeks, which I at first thought was going to be a welcomed break, but soon realised made my daily chores drag behind instead. After that, our journey towards moving houses began, mixed up with a long vacation to Japan, exams, birthday parties and weddings. I slept approximately 5 non-consecutive hours per night during this period, and struggled hard internally with the stress, weight gain, loosing chunks of hair and the constant feeling of being a bad parent. There was no space for creativity – which is my meditation, relaxation and escape from ulcers and sour faces.

Some days this is all I get to see my baby. It hurts beyond words, but thank all the Gods above and below for face calls. Here Igge is calling me to tell me that the ice cream truck is outside, but daddy won’t let him buy any ice cream. (We bought a pack of 45 the day before)

Then we came to Island of Arren, outside the Scottish coast. After our first day there, when I woke up in our castle hotel room to the smell of salty sea air and green hills, I felt sane and calm for the first time in months. I felt my creativity coming back, my fingers were itching to write and draw again. My head began to bubble with ideas for my personal fun-project, that one that always gets lost in stress, frustration and grey clouds. As we went jellyfish hunting along the coast of Arran the fire within me got stronger with every stranded jellyfish I found and knew the name of.

I hope that I’m back. At least I’ve made a slight return.

Barrel jellyfish, Lion’s mane jellyfish and ops, a glaze covered strawberry. The nerd has spoken.

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